By: Victor Olorunfemi

Man, I was close last year. I almost had it. I was right that it would be a #1 seed to win the NCAA tournament; I was just wrong about the region. That ends my streak of correct March Madness predictions at one (yes, I know, one doesn't meet the definition of a streak, don't be a hater), but I'm back, and I'm better.

Before I announce my winner, I'd like to give a disclaimer. If you're here for astute basketball analysis on why one team should be favored, so you can sound super knowledgeable in that lil school/office bracket challenge you're in, then this isn't the article for you. This is all vibes and arbitrary sequential analysis.

And if you're wondering, well, Victor, how did you get the winner correct in 2019 and the right seed of last year's winner if you're not using any basketball analysis? 

My response would be, aww, dawg, thank you for reading. Then, I'd tell you that you forgot to mention how I feel like I would have been right in 2020 if not for the pandemic, then I would say that I use something better than basketball to make my predictions. March Madness is way too volatile to even bother with basketball analysis; you have to look at what history tells you.

And with that said, the numbers tell me the winner of this year's tournament will be the #3 seed from the South Region.

 Tennessee will win this year's March Madness. Here's why:

Gap Teeth: 2-4-?

In 2003, Syracuse won the championship as the #3 seed, then two tournaments later, Florida won as a #3 seed, then four years after that, UConn won as a #3 seed. Two multiplied by two is four, and if you continue that sequence, the following number is eight. If you rule out the voided 2013 Louisville season and the Covid year, it's been eight tournaments since a #3 seed won.

That tells me it'll be a #3 seed this year. And if you're saying to yourself, "I don't know, bro-bro. That's not enough for me."

Don't worry; I got you. And thanks for reading to this point :)

1+1+1+1 = 3

Here is the seed in order of the five NCAA Champions between 1999 and 2003: #1, #1, #1, #1, #3

Here is the seed in order of the five NCAA Champions between 2007 and 2011: #1, #1, #1, #1, #3

Here is the seed in order of the last four NCAA Champions: #1, #1, #1, #1

What's next? That's right. A #3 seed is next.

Now that I've proven that to you, you're thinking, "Wow, this is better than any prediction I could have read on ESPN, but there are four #3 seeds; how did you land on Tennessee?"

And I would say, aw, man, thank you for the kind words, allow me to prove it to you.

Never Eat Soggy Waffles

Never Eat Slimy Warms. Nobody Eats Sour Watermelons. Never Embarrass Sad Walruses. Never Eat Shredded Wheat. Nie Ohne Seife Waschen (Shoutout to the Germans).

However you learned your Cardinal directions, it remains the same, North-East-South-West. And while the NCAA Tournament doesn't use the exact directions, the concept of four regions is the same.

Since 2000, there have been three occasions where the #3 seed won the championship.

2003: Syracuse, a #3 seed from the East bracket, won the tourney.

2006: Florida, a #3 seed from the Midwest (I know, Florida in the Midwest???) bracket, won the tourney.

2011: UConn, a #3 seed from the West (I know) bracket, won the tourney.

The only region missing in that sequence is the South.

And if that's not enough, wait until you read this.

You're The Only 10 I See

The South Region has won 5 of the last 6 NCAA tournaments. They won three in a row between 2015 and 2017 and have now won two in a row. That means that if a #3 seed from the South wins it, it will be the third time in a row the South has won the championship . . .

The best part is Tennessee enters March Madness as the tournament's overall #10 seed. So they're quite literally the only 10 you see (ba dum tss). I saved that joke for the end just in case it angered you enough to close the article. 

Tennessee will win this championship, and it'll probably be against a team from the West bracket.